Fausty was one of Doug Spink’s online names used when he left comments on forums. He also had a website by that name.
Little did Doug know that the Fausty alias was known to Law Enforcement. The old fausty.org domain now redirects to Doug Spink’s OneName account.
This is my simple religion. There’s no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is our temple, the philosophy is kindness.
– HH The Dalai Lama
Hi, I’m Fausty
. . . yes that Fausty 🙂
There’s a bit of a cottage industry specializing in Fausty-related trivia. Personally, I think I’m rather boring but since people seem to talk about me more than a little bit, I might as well get in on the action. In the time tested model, why not cut out the middleman? Ok, perhaps that’s a bit of a tall order, but at the least I can make it easier for the truly obsessed to begin their Faustian journey. In a sense, my life has become a form of performance art – it’s all out there, no secrets really. No sense in pretending otherwise – there’s genuine liberation and integrity of process in living true honesty, nothing hidden.
I love rumors as much as the next guy (ok, actually I don’t), but a small percentage of the ‘facts; that get circulated about yours truly are flat-out wrong. Really, there’s plenty of salacious bits to satisfy even the most insatiable Fausty-stalkers out there. . . why resort to making stuff up?
Ok, right off the bat I should say two things:
One, if you’re wondering who I ‘really am’ you may be disappointed. I’m me, naturally. I’ve posted and argued and debated and kvetched online as Fausty for almost exactly 15 years. No, it’s not a secret identity; it’s just who I am when I’m burning time behind the keyboard. You may feel like you know who my RL identity is, and you might be right. . . or maybe not. Who’s to say that there’s not more than one person who contributes to the Fausty legend?
Two, yes I am a zoophile. If you came here to read my long, angry, defensive denial of this simple fact you may as well stop right here. Being a ‘zoo’ means that my primary emotional, social, and physical bonds aren’t with other homo sapiens but instead are with dogs and horses. It’s been like that all my life and it really is a blessing – my world spans a broader range through the connections I have with my boys, referring to the stud dogs and stallions whom I share my family life. I’m fairly well known proponent of a more positive, healthy, optimistic strand of ‘zoo philosophy’ online: That is, I know many fellow zoos who feel as blessed and at peace as I with their unusual social orientation and I think it’s quite ok for us to revel in the beautiful parts of being a zoo. No, I’m not a spokesmodel for the zoo community – ha ha. Not only would I never accept such a job if offered, I can say quite confidently that there is no such creature, never has been, and almost certainly never will be. Zoos are way, way, way too ornery and individualistic for that. I speak for myself, nobody else.
My life revolves around ensuring the happiness, health, and security of my boys. Every day spent with them is a blessing. I carry the joyful memories of years spent with partners who have died – bonding with canines and equines, as I do, brings with it the profound challenge of watching one’s partners, lovers, and friends grow old and die. There’s a wisdom to be gained from this wrenching process, but I’m still struggling to find it.
Oh yeah, I do tech stuff too – you can jump over to goldensVPN for more about that side of my life. There’s other pieces, as well – perhaps in time I’ll add those in, but for now this is what’s here.
If the spirit moves you, it is technically possible to email me and I shall endeavor to respond with wit, sagacity, and not an inconsiderable amount of raw charisma. Not bad for ascii, eh?
The Fausty FAQ
I don’t mind answering questions, but some questions I’ve answered so many times that the bloom has gone off the rose, as it were. At the risk of tendentiousness, these handy Q&A’s might help streamline the process. Enjoy!
Q. Aren’t you ashamed of who you are? The mythical superbeing that runs my religion of choice says you are a horrible person, and he hates you!
A. Um, no – I’m not. I’m just a simple Buddhist, so I don’t get to argue that my superbeing can kick your superbeing’s ass. Instead, my spiritual choice is simple. I try to do what I can to help the world be a better place, to minimize suffering, and to manifest genuine love. Though I’ve tried and tried, nowhere in there can I figure out where my zooish relations with my boys break the rules – they’re happy, I’m happy, we love each other. . .end of story.
Q. But it’s gross!
A. Any sexual orientation that we don’t share, I suspect, presents itself as axiomatically ‘gross’ doesn’t it? Trust that some elements of Normal reproductive activity (that is, male and female humans exchanging bodily fluids, etc.) are less than attractive to me. But it’s ok – I understand that it works for them, and that it makes them happy as an extension of their love for each other. . . same goes for me. Different manifestation, same underlying emotion.
Q. Isn’t it abuse?
A. Any sexual activity, if undertaken with disregard for a partner’s interests and enjoyment, can be abusive – this really doesn’t apply to one orientation or another, it’s universal. There’s healthy and unhealthy expressions of sexual desire, in any sexual orientation. There’s nothing remotely coercive, abusive, or disrespectful about that part of my life and there never has been. I honestly cannot imagine intimacy that involves those sorts of negative elements, they are just like oil and water for me personally. Even the power/domination stuff that seems to be so exciting to many Normals just feels. . . alien to me.
As to the argument that any inter-species physical intimacy is by definition ‘abuse,’ well that’s just a prima faciae silly position isn’t it? I’ve posted many, many pages of analysis and thought on that subject in forums far and wide over the years – if you really want to explore in that level of detail, those words are all out there for your reading pleasure.
In sum, however, it’s simply logically impossible to declare inter-species intimacy to be ‘abuse’ whilst simultaneously admitting that sex within-species is not ‘abuse,’ and that the many other actions we take on behalf of – or with – our non-human companions are not ‘abuse’ as well. As a friend once commented with a certain flair for poetic imagery: ‘how can it be abuse to lick a dog’s balls, but not be abuse to cut them off?’
Q. Wow, it must have been pretty weird to grow up as a zoo, wasn’t it?
A. Honestly, yes it was. While my human friends were reaching puberty and groping other humans in the backseats of cars, I was chasin’ tail – literally. All the rituals and lessons and guidance that is available for Normal adolescents coming to terms with their sexuality were only tangentially relevant to me – if at all. My gay friends tell stories about how alienated their teen years were. . . well, if they were alienated, then mine were spent in another galaxy entirely!
Q. You must work really hard to keep your dirty secret, right?
A. No. My orientation and family life isn’t a secret in my ‘real life’ and hasn’t been for many years. It’s neither a secret nor is it dirty. I’m proud of my love for my partners, and I do my absolute best to be a terrific partner, friend, and guardian for them every day.
I was first ‘outed’ by another zoo in 1999, and since then I have accepted my public status – it’s water under the bridge. Just like most Normals, 99% of my everyday life is boring and has nothing to do with hot, exciting, newsworthy adventures – sorry to disappoint.
Q. Surely you have been arrested?
A. Yes, I’ve been arrested – but not because of my orientation. Prison sucks.
Q. Doesn’t everyone around you shun you because you are a zoo?
A. Nope. . .they shun me for all sorts of other reason! 🙂
Seriously, very few Normals I know in everyday life are too worked up over what I do behind closed doors with my boys. Anyone who knows us knows that we’re a genuinely happy and deeply loving (if unusual) family unit. I’m respectful of folks and don’t engage in inappropriate Public Displays of Affection – just like my Normal friends. With all the genuinely complex and frightening issues we all face in our world today, I’d like to think that the gritty details of my sex life just don’t make the cut. It’s really not that exciting – well, I find it exciting, but that’s the whole idea isn’t it?
Those who freak out at who I am certainly have the right to their own opinion on the subject. I’d like to think everyone is tolerant, mature, and appreciative of diversity but some folks have closed minds and hard hearts. If you are a hater and your blood is boiling at the mere thought that a freak like me walks the earth, well I honestly feel sorry for you. I’m not harming you – or anyone else – and my life is built around love and mutual respect. If that makes you angry, there’s a real problem there.
Oh, and just be honest about it ok? No need to hide behind idiotic nonsense to “justify” your hatred of who I am – at least have the balls to admit you hate me for no real reason other than that I’m different from you. Truth is, life isn’t a popularity contest and I’m really not in the business of trying to please you, the unknown and anonymous masses of internet life. Hey, that’s reality – deal with it.
Q. The people in your company probably don’t know about your zooishness do they?
A. Yes, they do. Life’s too short to live in a cramped, dark closet. I’m the “token zoo” of the company – shows that they value and respect diversity, doesn’t it? Don’t bother trying to get me fired by writing angry emails about my horrific “secret”. . . as you likely guessed if you’ve read this far, it’s no secret – and it’s not horrific. Wrong on both counts 🙂
Q. Do you wish you were Normal?
A. Nope.
Q. I hear you have starred in a bunch of “animal porn” movies – is that true?
A. Sorry, but it’s not true. There have been rumors of me being a porn star – of various flavors – for over a decade. I’m quite flattered, really, but that’s about it. As far as I know (barring hidden cameras, that is) there’s never been a video camera trained on me whilstin flagrante delicto, not once. I’ve never been paid so much as a penny for any form of sexual performance or spectacle, and I can’t see doing so in the future – hate to disappoint my many fans. So if you see an exceptionally studly two-legger in a porn video and are told that it’s good ‘ole Fausty, then alas ’tis not I. Maybe someday I willbecome a porn star – who knows? With all the rumors, though, I don’t see why I need to bother. . . I can always take credit for my (imaginary) porn career without needing to partake of the messy bits. I do have a “pornstar” t-shirt, which is kind of like being a porn star, right?
I’ve also never hosted a for-profit porn site (zoo or Normal), helped to run one, or done anything but visit them (gotta be honest there). Many such rumors abound, but like the rumors of my own personal porn-stardom, the rumors of my porn empire are nothing more than cerulean fantasy. I’m not sharp-elbowed enough to run a porn empire, really – it’s a rough business (from what I hear) and I’m a bit too trusting and concerned with the success of others. Admittedly, I have partied like a pornstar. . . more than once.